Dimly Lit

All my life is under shadowed veil,
Pale figures trudging through tasks,
Anger is a dull burn,
Pain is not sharp but aching,
My heart...
Is it still beating?
I can only tell when it's lodged in my throat.
When I'm choking on my angst.
When I'm gasping for love like air.
This half a life I'm living...
living... no.
Existing in.
There is no movement but the slow crumbly rocks taking out all that's underfoot.
Stumble, fall, bruise.
Slowly rise and trudge on,
might as well see where it leads.

Curse

I can't take it back.
Those hateful words still echoing in the air.
Even if I was sorry and begged.
On my knees with hands folded crying.
You wouldn't forget what I said.
That spite and malice dripping poison that can never be healed.
There is no cure.
I can't make it right.
I can't unsay what has been spoken.
I can't pretend it never happened.
I can't say I was lying.
That venom boiled up out of me like lava erupting.
Red hot.
Burning all to ashes.
Destruction and devastation.
A few words said that will not perish.
In your mind they are already carved in stone.
Made into a plaque that you will read every time you see my lips.
The lips that spoke those words
No amount of effort can break those words out of the air.